two years later (lyn)

When I was really on weight watchers, I was totally committed.  I religiously tracked every morsel of food I ate.  I weighed things to insure accuracy of my tracking.  If I weren't sure, I erred on the high side.  I never exceeded my points for the week.  I never went AWOL.  I was the perfect student and it showed.  In exactly 32 weeks, I lost 37.2 pounds, going from 160 to 122.8 (by April 28, 2010). Few things have made me feel as good.   Lucky I wasn’t interviewing for a job then and asked, “So, what are you most proud of?”

I got rid of all my big clothes, and bought (or recycled from my skinny days) skirts and pants in sizes 4 or 6.  I was back comfortably in small and medium tops.  I could easily button all my shirts.  My jeans were again a size 27 or 28.   That was almost two years ago, and all these clothes still fit.  

But I am no longer as vigilant as I once was.  I no longer track.  I no longer weigh foods.  And if I want a big piece of key lime pie for dessert, I just have it.  By doing this, I have been unable to lose the three pounds I’d like off.  Lately, I find myself thinking about food more than I have in the past.  Sometimes my day feels focused on what I’ll be having for dinner.  I attribute this to not being busy enough.  The project I’m working on is moving at a snail’s pace.  I don’t like to aimlessly wander the streets because I know I will inevitably find something to buy. I no longer have a son living at home, which eliminates the mundane, but time-consuming errands I once did for him.

Yes, I know, I could exercise more.  And yes, I know, I could track again for a few weeks.  But right now I don’t feel like doing either.  I just want to wake up, step on the scale, and magically see the number 122 again... a number I haven't consistently seen this year.