The UPS bastard finally drops off a box at my porch door instead of somewhere else on the property. Wrong name, wrong address. It belongs to my neighbor and it's heavy. Their phone number is unlisted. I have to drag it into my car and deliver it to them myself.
My aunts call. They got a "reverse 411 call" from the water department in their city informing them that they will have no water all day today. Aunt X knows the Mayor and calls his office to tell them that she had a bowel movement and asks if she can flush the toilet. She goes on to explain that she is irregular and never knows when she will be able to go and what are the odds it would have happened today of all days?! The Mayor's receptionist tells her to "flush it for goodness sake". My Aunt calls to ask if she did the right thing by calling.
T needs a prescription strength nasal spray. I go to the pharmacy at our health plan and wait in line with sick people hacking all around me. Get to the front of the line and they tell me the prescription was sent to the pharmacy in the town where T has an office. I tell them to re-route the prescription online. This takes an hour.
When I get stressed, I want to eat.
Instead of eating, however, I go to Dunkin' Donuts and buy a large green tea (green tea black with lemon is more difficult to order than you'd think given the green and black in the same sentence).
I take my tea to a park bench and sip it slowly, looking at the insanity all around me.
Once I restore my calm. I get back in the car to finish my shopping.
As Mr. Darcy said in Pride and Prejudice, "I shall conquer this. I shall!"
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