Monday, February 20, 2012

a visit to the dentist (lyn)

My teeth, if they were people, would be fat.  They attract food.  Lots of it.

I go to a new dentist today for a cleaning.  My criteria for choosing this dentist are: 

  1. Location:  he’s only three blocks away
  2. Referral: a friend of mine goes to him and likes him, and he graduated from Penn Dental
  3. Drugs: he uses nitrous oxide  
The dentist’s office is small and clean.  The hygienist is brisk and efficient. I ask for the nitrous oxide and when she asks if I can feel it I lie and say, “Only a little.”  Within minutes, I am enjoying my dental visit.  I can feel the pain of the cleaning, but the drug is miraculous, I don’t care.  I can hear Nicole’s instructions to open wide or turn to the right or “close you lips like you are sucking on a straw,” and I follow them like the good student I am.  Hygienists must love nitrous oxide.  I have become totally compliant.  Nicole agrees that it’s a great drug for most of her patients, except the ones who fall asleep.

I walk out feeling lighter.  My teeth look brighter and I feel cleaner.  I almost wish I could avoid eating for a few days just to prolong the effect of today’s cleaning.

Now that would be a great way to lose weight.  If only it were that easy.

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