Thursday, July 7, 2011

thank you? (m)

Went to a cousin's bridal shower last week.  Big discussion among family members as to how much to give (we don't do gifts, we do envelopes with cash or checks in them).  There were several conversations among my siblings and cousins about this as there was much to factor into the decision.

The bride-to-be is in her late thirties and has been working for years ("She doesn't need the money," some said).  She has been living with this guy for years (believe me, that still matters in my family who derisively refer to that type of arrangement as "playing house"...this gets you less money.)   The third major point is that she is having a destination wedding in a locale where some of us don't want to go and those who do, cannot afford to go ("Insult!" some exclaimed, thinking the bride was trying to keep them from the wedding).

I convinced everyone to look at this as an opportunity to skip a boring wedding and get it all over with in one occasion instead of two.  I lobbied to give her a generous combo shower/wedding gift.  We set a price (if we were a group of companies in one industry we would be accused of price-fixing). 

We get to the bridal shower and there is a sit-down dinner.  The food stunk.  That's all I heard from my cousins.  The food stunk.  The party favors were bottle openers in the shape of a flip-flop ("What the hell is this?" some complained) and a Hershey bar ("Not even Godiva," some argued).

Net/net: I'm on the hot seat for being so generous.  I was so stressed, I ate two Hershey bars.

Today, I open my mail and find a thank-you note from the bride-to-be.  It's a form letter.  Pre-printed.

Don't you think my phone rang off the hook all night with angry relatives yelling at me for coercing them into be generous?

My brother Phil tried to calm everyone down by reminding them there was the time we went to another cousin's wedding and, at the end of the receiving line, got a pre-printed, generic "thank you" note from one of the ushers on behalf of the bride and groom.  Class.

No comments:

Post a Comment