is it really only day 4? (lyn)

Today is Rosh Hashanah, the first day of the new year.  Before going to Temple this morning I agonized over what to wear (as if anyone besides me cares).  I had already chosen my staple-black skirt, but searching for the right top was a challenge.  After trying on a beautiful short tweed jacket that hangs unused in my closet, I opted for the matching Missoni black top.  A week ago I tried the same outfit on for my neighbors' hip young babysitter who thought it pulled in all the wrong places.  I wore it anyway.

So sitting it Temple, I'm thinking that I can really do this.  It’s the new year, and I want to look different by June.  I am pretty much a rule-abiding person, and can be quite disciplined.  As the rabbi is discussing the importance of Israel to the Jewish people, I'm thinking that at 5 pounds a month, June is giving me more than enough time to meet my goal.  With all my weight-focused thinking, it was easy to decline the cookies offered to us as we exited the synagogue.

Tonight, though, will be a challenge.  I am celebrating the new year with family, where there will be platters and platters of good fattening food.  I’m already planning my strategy-avoid the pre-meal trays of chopped liver, creamed herring and egg salad, and stick to the veggies without the dip, if possible.  Then, splurge on the meat.  I can eat, and should eat, 20 points a day, and have only consumed 6 so far today (coffee with a little half and half, an English muffin with jam, no butter, and an apple and some popcorn.  (As I write this, I still cannot honestly believe that I now look up the point value of foods on the Weight Watcher’s website.  It all feels so not-me).

I'm a black-and-white person.  I've always been good at setting and reaching goals that can be judged objectively.  I am not as good at reading subtleties.  I was horrible at office politics, and often (surprising only myself) got into trouble by innocently saying or doing the wrong thing.  I don't like passive-aggressive people.  I don't want to have to guess what someone means.  So setting a numeric goal, well that I like.  Either I’m successful or I’m not.  And even better, I am in total control of the outcome.