I was watching the local evening news while making dinner. As I was taking the stalks off the broccoli to prepare to steam them, I hear the newscaster say: "Next up, a very special birthday." Who cares, I thought, probably some old geezer.
Turns out, it's Edna's 110th birthday. She's a pretty spry thing, sitting in her wheelchair, boogeying to music. She's wearing a nice suit and has the obligatory corsage. She's outlived all but one family member....her 84 year-old son. The newscaster leans in and says (loudly): "Edna, what's your secret for living so long?"
Edna screams back: "Secret? I don't have no secret!" I look harder, Edna is eating something and has some schmutz on her suit. The newscaster turns to the camera and they pan out and he says: "Edna eats a large bag of Lay's Potato Chips every day!!"
I stare at my stalks of broccoli.
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